


We're Not Broken, Just Bent

by zahrawrites



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Cas' dad is against it all, Homophobia, Hurt Castiel, Hurt Dean, I'm Bad At Tagging, Kissing, M/M, Secret Relationship, Violence, there's probably loads more that i'm missing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-04
Updated: 2015-05-04
Packaged: 2018-03-26 15:10:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,091
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3855202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zahrawrites/pseuds/zahrawrites
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>How Dean and Cas make it work... and what happens the one time they don't.</p><p>I'm not entirely sure where this came from but Pink came on the radio and I thought 'hey, that would be a good deancas fic'...</p><p>I think the ending's kinda crappy. I just didn't know where to go with it tbh. I might write a part 2 to round it up or something...</p><p>Title is from Just Give Me A Reason by Pink.</p><p> </p><p>As usual, constructive criticism and comments are always welcome.</p><p>Enjoy x</p>
            </blockquote>





	We're Not Broken, Just Bent

The house is eerily quiet. Castiel’s been lying in his bed for well over an hour now. He glances over at his alarm clock – it reads 21:17 – and waits.

He strains to hear any movement outside his room, the last bedroom door to close was his brother Michael’s, about half an hour ago. His father had gone to bed early tonight too complaining of a pain in his back. It wasn’t completely out of routine but Castiel couldn’t help the small niggle of suspicion that itched in the back of his mind. Did they know?

Since they had started dating a few months ago, Dean had become well-versed with Castiel’s  _situation_. He knew that Castiel’s father and brothers disapproved of anything that didn’t fit within their straight-laced idea of tradition and heteronormativity... except they had no idea their youngest son and brother was sleeping with the enemy.  _Literally._

As Castiel waits for the familiar rumble of the Impala to roll past his house and park up the street for their weekly rendezvous’, he lets his mind drift to Dean.

In the beginning, Castiel had been very hesitant about letting himself engage with Dean’s incessant yet admirable flirting. He knew from Dean’s brother Sam – whom he tutored every week – that the elder Winchester genuinely liked him. A comfortable friendship grew from it, until one New Year’s Eve party in the neighborhood that both of their families had been invited to. Castiel blames the alcohol and the drugs (that he’d tried in secret that night with Dean) for his ridiculous courage when he'd leaned forward and kissed the green-eyed boy on the empty balcony as soon as the countdown hit zero - fireworks providing the perfect backdrop. He was glad that the balcony was so high up and away from prying eyes and nosy neighbors. After a flurry of panic and the inevitable intoxicated confessions, wandering hands, and persuasive mouths, Castiel had explained his home situation with the full expectation that Dean wouldn’t want anything to do with him afterwards.

He was wrong.

And that’s how they ended up here.

Every Friday night Castiel waits for the rumble of the Impala’s engine to roll past his house and park up the street, and then he crawls out of his window to meet Dean to spend some time together. He knows he should be more careful, he knows what happened to Jimmy – the son of a close family friend – who came out last summer… well, actually he doesn’t know  _exactly_  what happened. Jimmy just disappeared last summer before school started up again and Castiel has had an unsettling feeling that his father and brothers had a lot more to do with it than they let on.

A shiver runs down his spine as he thinks of what they might be capable of, but before he can let his mind wander too far, he hears what he’s been waiting for. Quietly, he slips out from underneath his blanket, pulls on his boots, slides open his window and crawls down the drainpipe.

He tries not to step on the leaves even though he can practically hear the tempting  _crunch_  that they’d make, and runs on light feet towards the only car with its brake lights on. Dean must be watching for him in the rear-view mirror as he always does because Castiel hears the familiar change of gear as Dean shifts it from P to D as he approaches.

He’s barely pulled the passenger side door shut before Dean greets him by pressing their lips together, hands Castiel his worn leather jacket for warmth and speeds away into the night.

"Where to tonight?" Castiel asks as he wraps himself in the jacket and inhales its familiar, safe scent.

Dean shrugs. "Eros Point?"

Castiel fixes him with narrow eyes and a smirk. "Are you trying to get into my pants Mr Winchester?" Eros Point was near the edge of the town and overlooked it. Over the years it had turned into a famous make-out area for teenagers. It was likely to be empty at this time.

Dean laughs and Castiel melts. "Honey, I’m  _always_  tryin’ to get into your pants."

He slides across the cold upholstery of the front bench towards the other boy and slides a hand around Dean’s thigh. The car jerks slightly as Dean’s breath hitches. Castiel presses his lips to the skin behind Dean’s ear and kisses his way down Dean’s neck before nipping at his lobe and whispering, " _Good_." He tangles his fingers in the hair at the nape of Dean’s neck which elicits a quiet, stifled moan.

Dean curses. "Fuck, Cas-"

"That’s the idea." Castiel whispers. He's working a mark into Dean’s skin as he slides his palm further up towards Dean’s crotch, when a hand is placed on top of it to stop him there.

"I don’t wanna die on the way." 

Castiel intertwines his hand in Dean’s and just says, "Then drive faster."

They arrive in record time and are half way to being completely naked in the backseat before something happens and Dean is grasping Castiel’s hands in his and gently trying to unlatch Castiel’s mouth from his neck.

"What is it?" Castiel asks, breathless, confused and only slightly irked at his boyfriend’s 180.

"I…" Dean fails.

"Just tell me."

There is apprehension in Dean’s eyes and genuine worry starts to creep into Castiel’s expression.

"It’s okay. Whatever it is, it’s okay." Castiel reassures, pressing his palm affectionately against Dean’s cheek. He leans in to kiss Dean but the other boy pulls back slightly. The hurt in Castiel’s eyes does not go unnoticed.

"That’s the thing. It’s not okay." Dean's voice is quiet, like he’s ashamed.

"Wh-what do you mean?" Castiel stutters because this sounds like-

"I’m not breaking up with you." Dean says quickly when he sees the panic on Cas’ face. "I just… this isn’t- I mean it’s not-"

"Don’t sugarcoat it."

"This  _thing_  isn’t working." Dean blurts out and makes the mistake of gesturing between them.

Castiel's expression drops. He withdraws his hand and when Dean goes to hold it, he pulls it away and begins to pull his t-shirt over his head with cold, detached purpose.

"Cas please - just listen to me, I didn’t mean it like that-"

"How else could you have meant it?" Castiel blazes, there’s fire in his eyes as he turns on Dean.

"Why did you wait so long to say anything?" He doesn’t let Dean reply. "You know what my family is like. I am sacrificing  _everything_  by being with you." It’s too late by the time Castiel realizes how that sounds.

"Well, I’m so sorry that I’m such an  _inconvenience_  for you." Dean retorts venomously.

"I didn’t mean it like that." Castiel imitates Dean.

"How else could you have meant it?" Dean repeats his boyfriend’s words snarkily.

They lapse into a frustrated silence again; Castiel’s hands are restless atop the t-shirt in his lap and pick at the fabric.

Eventually, Dean moves slowly to hold Castiel’s hand and is grateful when he is not met with rejection.

"I just meant that I worry about you a lot because… because you’re in this- this-" he half shrugs. "-relationship with me and I know, Cas,  _I know_  what your family are like."

Castiel looks at him, anger subsiding. His green eyes are wide with fierce worry, and a crease of stress between his brows.

"They’re like the freaking mafia-"

Castiel elicits a quiet, amused laugh but Dean doesn’t stop.

"-and your dad’s like a fucking mob boss, and you’re not  _free_  ‘cause you can’t tell them about us and I don’t know if  _this_ -" he gestures between them. "-is some crazy phase that you’re going through to piss ‘em off but I’ve heard stories about what they do to people and Cas-" his breathing hitches and Castiel takes the moment to kiss him.

"Am I even makin’ sense?" Dean asks, he’s not looking at his boyfriend – his eyes are trained on his lap when Castiel pulls back and rests their foreheads together.

"Their reputation precedes them and you’re worried I’m using you to rebel against them and how that might end for you." Castiel summarizes.

"I couldn’t give two fucks about me. I’m worried about how it might… end for  _you_."

"They wouldn’t hurt me."

Dean pulls away with a scoff and Castiel chases the contact.

"Tell that to Jimmy."

Castiel is quiet, Dean makes a sound of frustration. 

"You’re not free if you’re with me Cas. Maybe you should just-"

"Don’t you dare."

Dean startles at the determination in Castiel’s voice.

"Don’t you  _dare_  finish that sentence. I am perfectly happy with you. It doesn’t matter what they think."

Dean doesn’t look convinced and he’s averted his gaze.

"Look at me."

Dean doesn’t obey so Castiel turns his boyfriends’ head with a gentle palm to the cheek that he lets sit there even after Dean is looking at him. There is so much helplessness and pity in Dean’s expression that it causes a hurt inside Castiel’s chest.

"I promise you-" Castiel leans in to press their foreheads together again, sliding his other palm around the back of Dean’s neck so he can’t cower away.

"Don’t." Dean’s whispered plea is broken.

"I  _promise_ you-" Castiel barrels ahead. "-that I am not using you." He presses his lips softly and chastely against Dean’s.

His lips catch against Dean’s when he speaks again. "I promise you that I am happy."

Another kiss.

"I promise you that they will not hurt us." This time, the kiss is longer and filled with purpose.

"Cas-" Dean tries to protest.

" _Dean._  Listen to me." He waits a moment to make sure.

Dean’s breath is hot against his lips and the tension notches up. It’s quiet outside the car; the muted noise of traffic and people has been reduced to a hum as Castiel focuses on ensuring Dean’s breathing is normal and regular. In that moment, it is just them in that sturdy car and Castiel doesn’t feel trapped at all. His father or brothers don’t need to know about this because they do not matter.

He does not seek their approval.

All that matters is here and now and him and Dean and  _this._

So, when he speaks, it’s a whisper - barely audible - but he knows Dean is listening because his eyes have fluttered shut.

"What you and I have  _makes_  me free."

There’s a sharp exhale from Dean that sounds like relief but he doesn't get a chance to revel in it because the door opens behind him and then he’s being yanked away from Dean and thrown to the ground. His shirt is tossed at his chest and he barely has time to look up before there’s a fist flying at his face that knocks him into the dirt.

He hears a screaming  _CAS!_  from somewhere in front of him that sounds like Dean and he wants to reply but the pain from the punch is dizzying and he struggles to open his eyes and focus.

"You think you could hide it?" comes the question from a familiar booming voice that he could never mistake.

His father.

Which means it’s likely that Michael punched him - always their father’s loyal, obedient dog.

Castiel groans and holds his nose; he can feel the blood leaking from it. He tries to sit up and take in the scene but only gets as far as hunching over on his elbows.

Raphael and Zachariah have Dean on his knees and his face is bruised and bleeding too but he’s screaming Cas’ name in between cursing out the old man and struggling against the men who hold him.

"Dean…" he tries, but his attempt is weak and his brother laughs.

"Answer me, Castiel." His father says and strolls up to him. Castiel can just about see his own reflection in the polished black shoes that stand in front of him.

" _You sonuvabitch! Let him go! He didn’t do anything wrong!_ " he hears Dean shout. The boy receives a kick in the chest for it and doubles over coughing.

"No." Castiel replies to his father because he wants them to get out of this alive and compliance seems like the best way.

His father squats so Castiel is face to face with his chest, and places a finger under the boy’s chin to tilt his face up until he’s looking up into cold, ice blue eyes.

"Do not lie to me." He intones, and Castiel feels eight years old again, trying to lie about how the vase broke, when really - in a stupid, childish, regrettable burst of courage, he'd knocked it down on purpose. 

"That  _filth_  will drag you to Hell Castiel." His father says about Dean and he wishes he had the courage to pull out of his father's grip, to look away - but that's defiance, and defiance gets you hurt or killed. 

"You think I haven’t heard about him or his family." He continues like they’re bad people. "He’s going to be a mechanic like his father." He spits. "A  _failure_."

His father drops his face and straightens, letting Castiel turn to the dirt once again. He strolls over to Dean and strokes his index finger down the boy’s crimsoned face, contemplating something. Dean has the balls to stare Castiel’s father in the eyes.

He turns, and what he orders Michael sets Castiel’s heart racing in his chest.

"Start with the face." He glances back to Dean once and adds, "Specifically the eyes."

"No!" Castiel yells and scrambles forward because he knows what that means but he’s held back by Uriel who tightens his hold and snarls in his ear, "Now your  _boyfriend’s_  really gonna get it." Castiel struggles and screams Dean’s name over and over but it seems fruitless. Michael cracks his knuckles and retrieves a metal pole from the boot of their Range Rover, a pleased smirk on his lips. He rolls his neck as he approaches and swings the pole back and forth, watching Dean’s reaction.

There is no way that Dean isn’t terrified. It scares Castiel, his own heart is pounding against his chest and he’s struggling against Uriel's hold.

"No! Michael please! Father! Let him go!" He begs.

He's pretty sure he’s crying but he couldn’t care less because  _they’re going to bash Dean’s skull in_. Castiel is studying to be a doctor; he knows the potentially irreversible damage that will cause. There are a million and one promises spilling from his mouth but nobody’s listening. His father walks over to him and grips Castiel’s chin in his fingers and forces him to watch when he tries to look away.

"You think he’s special? You think he hasn’t given it up to other people?" His father asks, mouth turning up like Dean is something dirty.

" _Please_. He’s not like that. Father,  _please_. Don’t do this. I’ll stay away, I swear. I’ll change.  _Please_  don’t hurt him." He sobs, voice breaking, hoping any of it will change his father’s mind and call off Michael.

Castiel’s brother is gearing up to take the swing, his smirk turned to a fully-fledged psychotic grin. 

For the first time in a long time, Castiel prays. Closes his eyes and turns his heart to the high heavens. He doesn’t even know which deity he’s praying to, all of them probably, but he does it because there is nothing that  _he_  can do that will help Dean.

_Break my soul, take my life away, beat me, hurt me, kill me but for the love of God, don’t touch him._

_Don’t touch him._

_Don’t touch him._

_Save him._

He is so wrapped up in praying that it takes a moment for him to realize that his father is speaking to him again.

"Penance will not help you now. The things you have done are unforgiveable."

Castiel’s prayers spill over to his father but it’s hard to see through his tears. "Take me instead. Please stop, call Michael off. Punish  _me_."

His father doesn’t look surprised at Castiel’s sacrifice. "Oh, don’t worry. Your time will come, too." Then, he scoffs in disbelief. "What amazes me is that you thought that I was stupid. You thought I would not notice your disappearance every week."

"I’m sorry, please just-"

"Oh, stop your incessant whining." His father snaps.

Castiel hiccups through teary eyes and breathless pleas and quietens abruptly; unable to break apart from years of discipline.

Raphael and Zachariah push Dean forward so he falls to the floor on his face. It seems he has no energy to push himself up but when he tries, Raphael punches his jaw which prompts Zachariah to kick his stomach.

Dean spits up blood and tries to reach for his boyfriend but Castiel is sobbing and struggling in his brother’s arms.

Michael stabs the ground near Dean's head with the end of the pole as intimidation and Dean flinches noticeably. He scrapes it across the dirt, around Dean and bangs it into the ground twice in front of his eyes.

He lines up the pole with Dean's head like a golf swing.

Castiel holds his breath.

Michael smirks.

Dean’s blood stains the ground as his eyes roll up to the figure that looms over him.

The skies have darkened, ominous of the violence about to ensue. Castiel’s heart thunders like the heavens do. There is a flash of lightning and a rumble so loud that Castiel feels it vibrate in his chest.

His father tries not to flinch, but Castiel notices his distress.

Michael raises the pole, metal pointed at the sky, adjusts his grip and…

Castiel hardly has time to brace himself before there is another crack of lightning, a blood-curdling scream, and he’s thrown to the ground. Coughing up into the dirt, there is rain spitting down against his face, he looks up to see Michael shaking violently on the ground, incapacitated.

The lightning must have struck him.

Dean is still on the ground, not moving.

 _Not moving_ , Castiel realizes.

Before he can rush to Dean, his father grips his arm and sneers something that sounds like  _if you think you have a home to come back to, you’re wrong_ , but Castiel couldn’t care less: he doesn’t want to go back anyway. He pushes past his father and rushes to Dean’s side who’s struggling to move.

He blocks out his brothers shouts and helps – practically  _drags_  – Dean into the passenger side, shifts the Impala into D and drives them away leaving his  _family_  in the rear-view mirror.

**Author's Note:**

> If you're interested, my Tumblr is [here](http://prettyboydean.tumblr.com)  
> Drop me a message, tell me what you thought - I'd really appreciate it :)


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